It’s an everyday nursery rhyme, it’s simple to sing with your small child, and apparently this nursery rhyme about a little child watering her garden is watering your little child’s mind!

Early childhood educators have identified pre-reading skills that are necessary for the learning of reading and the mastery of language. They include phonological awareness, or the awareness of speech sounds and rhyme similarities, vocabulary or knowing lots of words, and the more a child loves the enjoyment and pleasure of using language, the more success they will have in reading and writing and academic studies. Nursery rhymes, with their words of imagery, rhymes and rhythm that children find so fun, have all these qualities!

Let’s look at other ways that you are probably already simply, instinctively and effectively watering your child’s mind, and what the researchers are now saying about it.

Let’s look at songs and music, activities that lots of caregivers instinctively share with their children. The National Network for Child Care at nncc.org/Series/good.time.music explains why songs, action songs, music and rhythm are important for children. They allow children to express their emotions, channel their energy creatively, gain confidence in themselves as they coordinate their minds and their bodies together, learn new words and ideas, and learn about themselves as they explore what they like, what they like when and what they can do. Learning these physical and emotional controls, ways of expression and self-knowledge are necessary for a happy life now in childhood and in their future adulthood. This is the real reason why we let our toddlers take out the pots, pans and wooden spoons and bang them, making a terrible ruckus.

How about even simpler, even more unassuming activities, such as having fun blowing a dandelion’s seeds into the air. The child development psychologists Linda Acredolo and Susan Goodwyn in their book “Baby Minds: Brain-Building Games Your Baby Will Love” explain that such a simple yet fun and stimulating activity will stimulate your baby’s brain development. The practical conclusion that these researchers draw from the latest research is that “If your baby is not having fun, it’s probably not worth doing”.

Thus, the conclusion we can draw is “If your small child is having fun, then it’s probably stimulating your child’s physical and mental development”. We already instinctively knew that, and so it’s wonderful to have researchers and experts confirming and encouraging this. Whenever my toddler pulls the toilet paper still on its roll and runs around the house redecorating it in toilet paper, I just tell myself that this is a fantastic activity for his brain, body and creative imagination.

Actually, small children are programmed to learn and to engage in activities that will develop their minds and bodies. It probably has not escaped your attention that kids will naturally invent a fun and interesting game (fun and interesting to the child) out of absolutely anything. The brain plasticity scientist Lise Eliot explains in “What’s Going On In There? How the Brain and Mind Develop in the First Five Years of Life” that there are way too many connections in the brain and communications with the rest of the body – billions of neurons and a quadrillion synapses at last count – for it to be preprogrammed in genetic DNA material. Thus, babies and children are programmed to try things out and to repetitively practise them for days and weeks and months, so that brain circuitry will sprout in the first place and then solidify to become permanent. Actually, this is my own layperson’s description. Lise Eliot refers to it as neurogenesis, synaptogenesis and myelination. It’s the reason why babies kick in the womb, so that the connection between the leg-kicking part of the brain and the actual leg can be developed. It’s the reason why my newly mobile son never tires of playing with the toilet brush in the toilet bowl, developing and practising his hand-eye coordination and his understanding of the physical world, in this visual, audio and tactile activity of splashing water.

We all know that cuddling our babies and children is important for their emotional and psychological development. Lise Eliot gives examples in the chapter “The Importance of Touch” of how touch and physical contact increases physical and brain development. Studies show that premature babies that receive cuddling and massages thrive measurably more and do better on visual baby tests. Children with various medical problems had better clinical outcomes after receiving massage therapy. Perhaps you have seen the famous “Rescuing Hug” (such as at daurelia.com/spirit/rescue or snopes.com/glurge/hug), where the physical touch of her baby twin sister was responsible for the very survival of a premature baby.

Let’s talk about talking. The very experienced authority on early childhood development Dr Burton White gives the following advice. Allow your newly mobile child to explore your home. He’ll bring things back to show you and will have a need to be fulfilled when doing that. Stop, quickly look and see what that need is, and then respond to the need. Dr Burton White says that the secret to teaching language, whether it be verbal language or sign language, is to respond to that need with language and play on that need. Dr White is the author of “First Three Years of Life” and “Raising a Happy Unspoiled Child”, and you can see and hear him giving this advice in Joseph Garcia’s “Sign with your Baby” video. And in my house, you can see me having a conversation with a toddler about a wet toilet brush he has just brought me.

How to increase your child’s mathematics ability? Studies have shown that studying music statistically significantly increases children’s math skills and spatial-temporal reasoning abilities. The question now is why. A “Today’s Parent” article cites a brain-imaging “Mozart Effect” type of study that showed that the same parts of the brain were active when listening to Mozart as when doing puzzles and playing chess, suggesting that music is like warm-up exercises for the brain. Another study cited in that article goes much further, suggesting that music is more than just a cultural artifact; that our brains are actually structured for music, just like our brains are structured for speech and walking. Brain patterns were mapped and assigned musical tones to mark changes in neural activity. When played back, instead of sounding like a random sequence of notes, it almost sounded like a melody of a recognizable style of music!

“No!” – We hear it from those terrible-twos toddlers. Well, Lise Eliot in “What’s Going On In There?” presents a study about the effects of parents saying “No”, “Don’t” and “Stop it” on the development of their children. Research established that children that heard a larger proportion of this type of negative feedback had poorer language skills than children whose parents kept their negative responses to a minimum and instead gave encouraging, positive and dialog-inducing responses. The online games at www.KiddiesGames.com provide a fun model of this positive pattern of interaction. When the child playing a game gets something right, the friendly child character on the screen says “That’s right!” or congratulates the player. When the child playing a game clicks on the wrong thing, the upbeat child on the screen doesn’t actually say “No” or “Wrong”. Instead, it explains in the same positive tone what the child playing just did and what another possible (and correct) answer could have been. The feedback is accurate and positively and cheeringly encouraging. As far as I know, there have been no studies done on the effects that toddlers saying “No” to their parents have on those parents…

Can you remember all this information next time you’re interacting with your small child? Let’s summarize it all like the current Canadian CBS Television campaign slogan – “1) Comfort, 2) play with and 3) teach your child”, in that order. This is how you water your child’s mind, and you’re probably already doing it. So follow your instinct, let your child lead the way to play, go with the flow and enjoy playing with your small child. While the results of recent studies may be news to you, the recommended actions are just a reminder!

The author, Emma Rath, is the creator of free, fun, educational online computer games for babies and preschoolers at www.kiddiesgames.com. These games encourage caregivers to cuddle their children on their lap while participating in games of open-ended exploration that never say “No”, except for one fun game whose serious mission is to undo the instinctive child behavior of hiding in the case of a house fire.

The Right Time To Start Potty Training

If you can successfully figure out when the right time to start potty training is then you have half of the battle won already. It is a very delicate matter and care should be taken in choosing the right time to start.

Most children are ready to begin potty training somewhere between 18 months and 36 months. If you start too early the child will get confused as it will be unable to control its own body movements. Trying to learn how to use the potty and not physically being able to will not only frustrate the child and yourself but will also make the task much more difficult in the long run. On the other hand, starting too late will also be a problem making it much more difficult to achieve as bad habits will have set in and will be difficult to break.

Your child should be giving you tell tale signs that they are ready to begin using the potty. They should be holding liquids and staying dry for periods of up to two hours or so, they should be at a development stage where they can understand you and follow up to 2 commands given at once, they should start showing a natural interest in the toilet and may even try to imitate other family members. All of these signs normally become apparent at around the 18 month – 2 year mark but can vary greatly from child to child. Each child will have their own time for beginning the process and should be giving you clear signals when the time is right.

Once you have established that the time is nearing and your child is ready to start potty training then first of all you should do a bit of research into the various methods and approaches that exist, choose one and try to stick to it. It will be counterproductive to go switching tactics each time there is a slight hiccup in the progress. If you are certain that your method isn’t working once embarked upon and you find another method more suitable then by all means change but it is not advisable to change between on method and another and then back again simply so as to not confuse the child. The key to success in potty training is to teach your child a routine. The child is young and may take time to adapt to that routine but as with any learning the key is in the repetition. The same actions time after time will eventually lead to assimilation of the idea and soon your child will be using the potty and the toilet as if they had been doing so for ever.

Once you have chosen a method you will follow you should start getting ready for the potty training or ‘pre-potty training’.

You should show the potty to your child, show them how to use it. (Maybe practice with a doll). When getting dressed or undressed you should make a point of trying to get the child to pull up or down their own pants (with your hands guiding theirs if necessary). Read them potty story books and / or show them potty story videos.

After a few days of ‘getting them used to the idea’ you can start the actual potty training itself.

First of all you should dress your child in loose fitting pants so that they will be able to pull them up and down easily themselves without your help. You should make a commitment to not use diapers any more, use pull ups or training pants and don’t be tempted to go back to the diapers as this will confuse the child. You may however want to carry on using diapers at night until the daytime training is well under way.

Give your child plenty of liquids at first so that they will need to go a little more often than usual. After about half an hour of so you can then run them through the process,

Let them know what you are about to do, tell them the words you want them to use when they need to go the potty so they can let you know, e.g. ‘pee pee’ or ‘potty’ or whatever you chose.

Say your chosen words to them then walk them (with a certain urgency) to their potty, have them pull down their pants sit them on the potty and wait for them to do something. If they don’t do anything then spend a short while waiting, read a book or sing to them. If this doesn’t work then have them pull up their pants and wash their hands anyway and try again in another half an hour.

If they do go then make a big fuss of them, tell them they are big and gown up now and that you’re proud of them or other words of encouragement. The encouragement will motivate any child no end and will make them want to repeat the process to please you again.

In the event of an accident you should take the child back to the ‘scene’ of the accident and then walk them to the toilet or the potty, have them pull down their pants and sit in the potty, even if they don’t go any more just so they will associate the potty with the accident. Clean them up and have them pull up their pants and wash their hands. It is important not to be cross or punish the child when they have an accident, simply tell them to tell you and do it in the potty next time.

The whole process of potty training can be a long and slow one but with a bit of patience and a lot of repetition then there will be positive lasting results.

At htpp://pottyaid.com there is lots more information and other articles similar to this one. There is also the 5 day email course you can sign up for free of charge – Potty Training made easy.

Sign up for the free Potty Training E-Course

Additional Resources:

The Potty Trainer
I can highly recommend the Potty Trainer Ebook. Johanne Cesar has done such a great job in putting a tremendous amount of hands on potty training information and advice in this ebook. You will get a step by step guide to potty training your child.

Toilet training can be fun and drama free. The most important thing to do to ensure that the process is easy for all involved is to make sure that your child is ready before you start the process.

How do you know if your toddler is ready to be toilet trained? Well, there are some clear indicators that your child might be ready. These include long dry spells followed by a big wet nappy, being able to tell those around that they have wet or dirtied their nappy, and being able to pull their pants down/ up and sit on the potty independently. Those are the main things to look for. If your toddler is showing these signs then they may be ready. So, it is your job to get the environment ready for them to learn to use the potty or toilet.

If you are using a potty then consider putting it in the place where your child spends most of it’s awake time. That way it is easy to access and you can remind your toddler to use it regularly. If you are using the toilet then consider using a toddler attachment to make your child feel more secure and comfortable. A step might also help your child begin to toilet independently.

In order for toilet training to be as painless and smooth as possible, make sure that you and your child are ready. Some toddlers toilet train quite easily, while for others it becomes what seems like a long drawn out battle. If you are incredibly busy at work, moving to a new house or a new baby is due soon, it’s ok to wait a few months to let things settle down. You might need to be prepared for a few accidents and extra dirty clothes during the process.

Above all you need to make this a positive process for your child. They need to learn that this is a natural thing and should never be told that their body is dirty or yucky. Use lots of encouraging words and hugs to reward your child’s successes. Praise is a fantastic motivator! This is probably one of the biggest steps for your child and it’s worth your patience.

In 1995 I completed my Bachelor of Teaching, specializing in Early Childhood Education. I have worked in education since 1996. I started in Child Care as a Preschool teacher. I have also worked as an ESL teacher and have been promoted to the level Teacher of Exemplary Practice.

I’m a mother of two boys, 5 and nearly 2 years old. Although parenting my two wonderful children is my main focus, furthering my understandings about how children learn and develop is something of great interest to me. I have been doing a Master of Education for the past two years.

I am interested in parenting, as a teacher, as a mother and a member of a wider community. How we look after our children does impact on others in the world around us. I believe I have something valuable to share. I hope you find it interesting and useful.

For more information and articles please check out my website http://www.saneparenting.com

Sign up for the free Potty Training E-Course

Additional Resources:

The Potty Trainer
I can highly recommend the Potty Trainer Ebook. Johanne Cesar has done such a great job in putting a tremendous amount of hands on potty training information and advice in this ebook. You will get a step by step guide to potty training your child.

Some very lucky parents find their child easily potty trains without many issues. Other parents aren’t so lucky. Some will try for months without result or just as they are making progress the child seems to regress.

It’s not easy trying to decide what the right age for potty training your child is, The recommended age by many pediatricians is somewhere between 18 months to 36 months.

However, this doesn’t mean that as soon as your child turns 18 months you have to rush out and buy a potty. This is just a guideline and you should use your own judgment as to what age is best for your child to start, after all you know your child best.

Here are a few signs that may show your child is ready to start potty training:

She starts bending down or squats when she needs to go.

He goes to a more private place when he feels the need to go.

She starts showing an interest in your toilet habits by looking or asking what you’re doing.

He feels uneasy when his diaper is wet or filled and show relieve when you clean him.

She shows awareness of what she’s doing or will actually tell you when she’s going.

He understands basic instructions and interacts and responds to questions.
If your child is showing some of the signs above, it may mean she’s ready to start potty training. There are times though when a child will show the signs and still not want to sit on the potty. If your child refuses to sit down or wear big boy underpants then it may be best to wait a little longer.

Some children may show signs of being ready mentally or emotionally but physically their body may not be ready. They may just not be able to hold it for very long and this will lead to many accidents.

In cases like this, rather than struggle to potty train your child it may just be best to wait. When a child is fully ready for training they should respond well and train in a fairly short amount of time. When children take a little longer than expected it may be because they started training too early.

Ultimately the decision lies in your hands and you know your child best. You can always give it a try and see how your child reacts or you can buy a potty and put it out so your child can start getting familiar with it.

Additional Resources:

Potty Training Tips
Potty Training Advice and Tips From Moms & Dads Like You.

In today’s busy world, many parents have lost the art of telling their stories to their kids. Here are ten reasons why these stories are so beneficial:

1. Use them to teach lessons about life.

Stories will stimulate conversations with your kids more effectively than lecturing or “trying to get them to talk. There are a lot of issues happening for your kids these days, and stories give them a chance to reflect on them.

2. Stories connect your kids with previous generations.

In a society that seems to have families spread out all over, it’s vitally important to have ways to have your kids feel connected to their extended families.

3. Stories stimulate your kids’ imagination.

One of the best ways to prepare your kids for the world is to engage them in vivid stories that stir their imagination. Kids who are exposed to these kinds of stories will be the creative problem-solvers of the future.

4. Kids who are exposed to stories will continue the tradition with their own families.

Knowing that your family traditions and stories will be carried on by future generations is very comforting.

5. Stories can encourage your kids when they’re discouraged.

Childhood can get pretty discouraging sometimes. Kids are encouraged by knowing that Mom or Dad have gone through the same kinds of things and have survived.

6. Telling your stories has you remembering your own childhood.

Telling your kids about your childhood is a great way for you to remember and reflect on what was important about your younger years.

7. Telling stories helps to create depth and soul in your kids.

In a TV and media-crazy culture, telling stories can capture your kids’ attention and convey real meaning. It’s a way to show your kids what’s really important in your life.

8. Telling stories to your kids tells them they’re worth the time.

Is there anything more important than conveying to your kids that you want to spend intimate time with them? They’ll remember it forever.

9. Telling stories is a great chance to convey your values.

Your kids will be getting quite a few messages from their friends and from popular culture. Stories are a great opportunity to sneak in a few of your cherished values for your kids to hear.

10. Well-crafted stories create a wonderful mind-set for your kids before they fall asleep.

Kids will fall asleep faster and with healthier images when you tell them your stories.

Don’t pass up the opportunity to connect with your kids, at the same time you tell them what’s important to you.

It will be a huge gift to your kids, and a huge gift to you.

Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC, coaches busy parents by phone to balance their life and improve their family relationships. For a FREE twenty minute sample session by phone; ebooks, courses, articles, and a FREE newsletter, go to markbrandenburg.com. or email him at mark@markbrandenburg.com.

5 Easy Ways to Teach Kids Empathy

We all want our kids to develop empathy — that essential knack for understanding how another person feels and responding with kindness.

Fortunately, some simple, effective strategies can help empathy bloom as our children grow. Here are five strategies that busy parents can use:

1. Help your child describe his or her own feelings.

Kids need to be able to label their own feelings in order to understand how others feel. “Mad,” “sad,” and “happy” will probably be the starting point. From there, your child can learn words like “disappointed,” “surprised,” “excited,” “scared,” “thankful,” “left out,” and more.

2. Read books or watch TV together and discuss the characters’ feelings.

Point out facial expressions and other “body-language” clues to feelings when you look at illustrations together.

3. Discuss how different behaviors influence the feelings of others.

For example, you could say, “Grandma looked so happy when you said thank you for her gift! Did you see her big smile?”

4. Model and practice consideration for the feelings of others.

When we treat our child with empathy, we provide not only emotional nourishment but also a model of kindness that our child can imitate. We can also help our child practice empathy by saying things like, “That little girl looks lonely. Do you think you could see if she wants to play with you?” or, “Dad looks hot and tired. How about if we take him a glass of lemonade?”

5. When your child does a kind deed, comment on it. “Oh, you’re helping me clean up the juice I spilled — that’s being KIND! Thank you!”

With these small, everyday steps, you’ll gently guide your child on the road to becoming a kind, compassionate adult.

(c) Norma Schmidt, LLC (limited liability corporation)

Norma Schmidt is a parent, a parenting workshop leader and the author of way too many articles and online publications to mention here. Her latest e-book, “The Parent’s Bag of Behavior Tricks,” is ready for instant downloading at http://www.BehaviorMagic.com Get Norma’s free report, “Boost Your Child’s Money IQ: 61 Ways to Raise Wise, Responsible Money Managers,” at http://www.ParentCafeOnline.com

Additional Resources:

Baby Sleep Secrets
Get your child to sleep through the night with just a few tweak and finally get that good night sleep you both need and deserve.

Inspirational Kids’ Stories
A Collection of Children’s Bedtime Stories that nurture, inspire and educate.

When we were children, most of us grew up without the kind of extravagant things that seem normal for children to have today. More importantly, we were happy just the same. Just take a look at the young celebrities of today, most are role models to swarms of teenagers, and it becomes very clear that these kids had little to no constructive home life; instead they were spoiled young children and handed everything they could ever want. Is it even possible to raise happy children today without handing them over everything they thing they need? The answer is an unequivocal yes.

Take a look inside any school and you will find kids toting expensive cell phones; the coolest ipod; the latest footwear and clothing; as well as the newest and most popular electronics you can find. What does this say about how we raise our children? What are they missing in exchange for these expensive material items?

Our children’s role models are relegated to celebrities whose lives are often filled with drugs, all night parties, arrests, and visits to rehabilitation centers. If you look into the background of any of these people, you’ll find something common about how they were raised. Even if they say they are happy, it is very obvious that it isn’t the case.

What parent isn’t concerned about raising happy children? Also, giving them everything in the world isn’t a consideration. By spoiling children we are actually robbing them of something we thought we could just pay for and hand over with the latest and greatest gadget. By giving a child everything they desire is to deprive them of experiencing the ups and down of life; and prevents them from working hard to find their niche in life.

There is an old saying, “if you don’t expect it, you’ll never be disappointed.” If children get everything they ever wanted, how can they learn that in life you don’t always get everything you want or try? They will never appreciate the simple things and achievements, but be on a constant search for things that are unattainable.

The bottom line is that it starts at home with the values, morals, support and encouragement that the parents offer to the child. When parents show a child unconditional love and not unconditional stuff then the child will start to see that they can have everything they want and will realize the things that are of the most value can’t be bought.

We recommend:
Dine Without Whine
The family friendly menu mailer – Dinner recipes that you and your kids will love send to your inbox everyday. Christine will even create a grocery list for you. Fixing dinner every night couldn’t be easier. Give it a try!

“Mom, I’m bored!”

“Dad, play with me!!”

Sound familiar?

one that need to be done (including the toughest job of all, parenting). These SneIf you’re a parent, these plaintive cries from your children can become daily shouts. As busy moms and dads, we’re continuously torn by the demands on our time. Here are some simple ways to spend time with your kids while getting the jobs daky Fun ideas are also great ways to teach our children exactly how to successfully accomplish many routine tasks.

- Make a silly dinner together.
Think ‘Green Eggs and Ham’ or try a picnic on the living room floor. Bring your child along for the meal planning, shopping, prep time and clean-up. Involve them each step of the way.

- Turn on the music and clean, clean, clean.
Forget TELLING your kids to go clean; side-by-side, with some of their favorite music playing, move through the house dancing and cleaning. They’ll love it (and so will you).

- Exercise together.
You know you need to do it. Your child is your perfect exercise partner. Make it a ‘talk and play’ time and you’ll both get fit together.

- Share a hobby.
Love to fish, garden, sew, paint, sing? Share that love with your youngster. Try an interest that fascinates them. Learn a shared passion – together.

- Start a girls or boys night out.
You will make an incredible impression with this one. Take your daughter out for regular manicures and lunch. Stay close to your son with a favorite concert or sporting event. Teach your children about wholesome entertainment and the joy of healthy relationships. You can even team up with another parent and child for regular fun; just make sure that honest conversation is the true priority.

- Improve their skills.
Do you have a student struggling with homework? Quit nagging and ask them to teach YOU what they’ve learned. Be a patient listener. The fastest way to learn is often to teach.

- Wash the cars.
Need I say more? Water, the chance to soak mom or dad, and a sense of accomplishment when it’s all done. Follow up with an ice cream cone for a job well done.

- Growing things.
Countless gardeners have discovered deep satisfaction in sharing their love of growing things with children and grandchildren. Gardening is a useful de-stressing tool and the most frustrated child tends to loosen up and share their heart while getting their hands dirty alongside a trusted adult.

- Plan, plan, plan.
If your household is anything like mine, it benefits greatly when I take the time to map out regular activities. Menu-planning, budgeting and vacationing come to mind, for starters. Show your child (of the appropriate age) how to use their time and money wisely by including them in the planning of everyday family activities. As they mature, they can easily be put in charge of some of these planning sessions, teaching them to younger siblings. Your trust and belief in your kids can ease the stress on them as they grow, too.

- Organize.
Almost all families struggle with organization in some area. Truth be told, we’re simply busy people and have often outgrown the simplistic organizing methods that once worked just fine. Give your kids the opportunity to be the creative organizer in your family. Whether its making sense of the family photos or tackling the hall closet, do it with them to get the job done and make a memory that’s shared.

- Schedule the fun.
Sometimes the best defense is a good offense. Try scheduling a set time of fun in exchange for a set time of work. For example, Monday can be family board game night while Saturday morning sees the family hard at work in the yard. Sometimes it’s easier for kids to see the point when it’s a straight trade off of time and energy.

The idea here is simple and clear. Use everyday activities to build relationships and teach responsibility. After all, everybody wins when ‘fun’ becomes a part of daily life!

About the Author: Colleen Langenfeld energizes busy working mothers with career, organizing, meal-planning, parenting ideas and more using the free Working Mothers Great Idea Kit at paintedgold.com/moms.

One of my first memories of childhood is that of my mother reading Dr. Seuss books to me in a big brown recliner in our living room. That memory brings with it sounds and smells and a general feeling of safety and comfort that never fades, even after all these years. Naturally, one of the first memories I have of my own first born child is sitting in a big chair and reading Little Golden Books to him.

Sharing books and reading with my children is as natural as giving them baths and making their breakfast. It’s just something I do everyday, and it’s one of the most pleasurable moments of my day. I love to hold my two year old in my lap while we snuggle up and look through his ever growing library of books. His favorite books change weekly as his interests broaden. Books open up the world to him and his imagination is bubbling over with new ideas every day.

More than just telling a story, books help children better understand their own ideas and feelings and often calm an upset toddler when nothing else will work. They see and hear about other kids like them and others from around the world who are different. We’ve all seen little kids acting out the stories they hear. As a child I spent many afternoons pretending to be the characters from my favorite books. Just recently my son was playing ‘Dr.Dan. The Bandage Man’, a current favorite Little Golden Book.

Although reading with children is so very rewarding for both adult and child, little kids need time to look at books alone. This allows them the opportunity to look at the pictures and develop the habit of ‘reading’ even though they can’t yet read. In my Family Child Care, I have different ‘libraries’ available in different rooms in my home. The kids have labeled these areas ‘libraries’ themselves, and will often rotate the books from room to room and act out ‘going to the library’ daily. Imagine my surprise when I first witnessed a three year old taking the younger kids ‘to the library.’

Because books are a very user-friendly activity and require no prep or cleanup other than returning them to the ‘library’, parents can and should use any opportunity to share books with their young children. Long car or plane trips, waiting rooms, in shopping carts, you name it, you can hand a child a book and make just about any transition or otherwise boring activity exciting. Books and reading can be both a group or individual activity, and many children who are normally shy in a group setting will sit in the reading circle and share story-time while making new friends.

By sharing books with your young child, you are planting a precious memory that will last a lifetime for both parent and child. They in turn will continue the tradition with their own children and remember those special times. A world of experiences and ideas are waiting for you to introduce to them.

About the Author: Sherry Frewerd is a Proud Work At Home Mother of 3 musical children. A Family Child Care Provider for 10 years, she also publishes several websites, specifically familyplayandlearn.com Family Play and Learn: Play and Learning Resources for Parents and Family Child Care Providers.

Additional Resources:

Child Product Reviews
Take a look at our product reviews, including book reviews.

Frontline Phonics Review
A complete system to help you teach your child to read.

Potty Training Tips
Potty Training Advice and Tips From Moms & Dads Like You.

Having a high level of emotional intelligence in your children is the best way to ensure that they live a happy, successful, and responsible life as an adult. Here are ten ways to help your kids attain a high degree of emotional intelligence:

1. Model emotional intelligence yourself

Yes, your kids are watching very closely. They see how you respond to frustration, they see how resilient you are, and they see whether you’re aware of your own feelings and the feelings of others.

2. Be willing to say “no” to your kids

There’s a lot of stuff out there for kids. And your kids will ask for a lot of it. Saying no will give your kids an opportunity to deal with disappointment and to learn impulse control. To a certain degree, your job as a parent is to allow your kids to be frustrated and to work through it. Kids who always get what they want typically aren’t very happy.

3. Be aware of your parental “hotspots”

Know what your issues are-what makes you come unglued and what’s this really about? Is it not being in control? Not being respected? Underneath these issues lies a fear about something. Get to know what your fear is so you’re less likely to come unglued when you’re with your kids. Knowing your issues doesn’t make them go away, it just makes it easier to plan for and to deal with.

4. Practice and hone your skills at being non-judgmental

Start labeling feelings and avoid name-calling. Say, “he seems angry,” rather than, “what a jerk.” When your kids are whiny or crying, saying things like, “you seem sad,” will always be better than just asking them to stop. Depriving kids of the feelings they’re experiencing will only drive them underground and make them stronger.

5. Start coaching your kids

When kids are beyond the toddler years, you can start coaching them to help them to be more responsible. Instead of “get your hat and gloves,” you can ask, “what do you need to be ready for school?” Constantly telling your kids what to do does not help them to develop confidence and responsibility.

6. Always be willing to be part of the problem

See yourself as having something to do with every problem that comes along. Most problems in families get bigger when parents respond to them in a way that exacerbates the problem. If your child makes a mistake, remember how crucial it is for you to have a calm, reasoned response.

7. Get your kids involved in household duties at an early age

Research suggests that kids who are involved in household chores from an early age tend to be happier and more successful. Why? From an early age, they’re made to feel they are an important part of the family. Kids want to belong and to feel like they’re valuable.

8. Limit your kids access to mass media mania

Young kids need to play, not spend time in front of a screen. To develop creativity and problem-solving skills, allow your kids time to use free play. Much of the mass media market can teach your kids about consumerism, sarcasm, and violence. What your kids learn from you and from free play with others will provide the seeds for future emotional intelligence.

9. Talk about feelings as a family

State your emotional goals as a family. These might be no yelling, no name-calling, be respectful at all times, etc. Families that talk about their goals are more likely to be aware of them and to achieve them. As the parent, you then have to “walk the talk.”

10. See your kids as wonderful

There is no greater way to create emotional intelligence in your child than to see them as wonderful and capable. One law of the universe is, “what you think about expands.” If you see your child and think about them as wonderful, you’ll get a lot of “wonderful.” If you think about your child as a problem, you’ll get a lot of problems.

Having a high IQ is nice, but having a high “EQ” is even better. Make these ten ideas daily habits and you’ll give your kids the best chance possible to be happy, productive, and responsible adults.

Additional Resources:

Potty Training Tips
Potty Training Advice and Tips From Moms & Dads Like You.

Mark Brandenburg MA, CPCC, coaches busy parents by phone to balance their life and improve their family relationships. For a FREE twenty minute sample session by phone; ebooks, courses, articles, and a FREE newsletter, go to http://www.markbrandenburg.com. or email him at mark@markbrandenburg.com.