Helping Deal With Toddler Temper Tantrums

September 20, 2008

Almost every two to three year old goes through a tantrum phase. Here are some suggestions for helping you deal with toddler temper tantrums.

The terrible twos… Even the most dignified parent has been left red-faced and wanting to be swallowed into the ground while their toddler is having a public meltdown.

Here are a few easy ideas for avoiding toddler tantrums:

Don’t Let Them Get Over Tired – Don’t let your toddler become too tired. Set a regular nap routine and try to stick to it, and make sure he goes to bed at a reasonable time and gets enough sleep during the night. Tiredness is often the first reason for a tantrum.

Keep Sugar Levels Stable – Don’t let your toddler’s blood sugar levels dip too low. This will make him irritable and tired, the tantrum will soon follow. Make sure he has plenty of small nutritious snacks throughout the day to provide him with a steady source of energy to avoid blood sugar dips.

Give Them Time – Allow enough time for activities like getting dressed, brushing their hair and getting in and out of the car. Your toddler will want to do a lot of these things on his own and rushing him is a sure way to start a tantrum. Give him a little extra time and let him try to be independent by allowing him to do certain things for himself.

Put it Away - Is there a certain item that always causes your toddler to have a tantrum? A food that’s only for after dinner or an item he shouldn’t have. Then put it where he can’t see it. Out of sight, out of mind, is a great way of avoiding tantrums.

Ignore It – This is easier said than done and of course it depends where your child is having his tantrum. If you’re in the middle of the supermarket you can’t just walk away or ignore your child especially if they’re grabbing or breaking things. In this instance it may be best to gently pick up your child and take him outside or to an area away from people and noise. Give him a few minutes to calm down and a big hug.

If your child is having a tantrum in a safe place like at home, then it’s best to walk away until he calms down. Make sure he can’t hurt himself or anything or anyone else and just walk away. Once he’s finished give him a hug and talk about what he’s feeling.

Give Him a Hug – Many times your child just needs to be held and needs you to help him control his emotions. If he’s in the middle of a tantrum try gently hugging him and just hold him. A lot of the times this will completely diffuse the tantrum. Be sensitive to his reactions and if you see your hug is only making him more upset then give him a little space instead or try a different approach.

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Ten Things You Can Do To Help A Shy Child

September 20, 2008

By Bridget Mwape

There are a few points about shyness in children which will help you better understand the best approach in dealing with your child. You will need to identify the nature of your child’s shyness. Children are shy in different ways for different reasons. Understanding the nature of your child’s shyness will help you develop a program geared towards your child’s specific needs. Here are some tips to help you get started.

1. First of all, are you sure your child really is shy? Some children like to size up a situation before they jump in. Caution should not be misunderstood as shyness.

2. You’ll need to find out the type of situations that make your child shy. Some children are shy only when they are in a group. Others become shy when asked to make a presentation in front of the class at school. Try to identify the specific skills your child needs to be more at ease in social situations which make them to be shy.

3. Don’t call your child “shy”. Studies have shown that often a child will grow to fit a label. Parental pressure on the shy child can cause anxiety and insecurity, leading to a worse problem with shyness. Don’t push your child to achieve above his or her individual level. If you have to use the word ‘shy’ to describe your child always pair it with something positive, e.g. “John is a little shy around people but he is a brilliant pianist!”

4. Never compare your shy child with other children in a negative way. And never allow anyone else to hurt your child in this way.

5. Take your child’s ideas seriously. By lessening the importance of a child’s concerns you lessen the child.

6. Help your child identify talents and hobbies that make him or her feel special.

7. Seek out activities that offer an opportunity for growth and increased interaction with other children of his or her age. Encourage your child to get involved in activities with others. Don’t allow too many isolating activities, like watching TV.

8. Never push your child to do things he or she would find unbearable. Rather, make suggestions, but realize your child may not be ready. Be patient.

9. You need not handle your shy child with kid gloves, but be aware of how he feels and show that you understand.

10. Seek qualified professional help if necessary.

Being shy doesn’t have to mean that something is wrong with your child. It simply means that your child is uncomfortable in social situations. You can start your search for help by reading books, talking with other parents of shy children, taking classes, searching for information on the web or by speaking with your pastor. But if your child needs immediate help it’s best to consult a qualified child counsellor. You can read some more articles about parenting at:

Copyright © 2005, Bridget Mwape writes for the Baby Shop UK:  which features baby information including articles and discounts on baby products, gifts and advice from other parents.

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My Child Won’t Share

September 10, 2008

Help, my child won’t share. Does that sound familiar? Almost every child will go through a phase where
he or she won’t share. Here are some tips on how to deal with this situation.
If you’re the parent of a toddler I’m sure at some point you have experienced the above named syndrome, and if you haven’t beware… It’s bound to crop up in the not too distant future.

The first thing you should know is that your child is experiencing a very normal part of development. Even the most reasonable of children will not want to share their precious things at some point.

As embarrassing or difficult as this can be don’t get too discouraged by their behavior and certainly don’t blame yourself or your parenting skills. Take comfort in knowing that this is simply part of your child’s development and is helping her prepare for her next stage of life.

The good news is you can gently deter this situation even before it starts. Here are a few tips:

Distraction Technique – Distract your child with another toy or ask her to come and join you to play on the swings, etc. without making a big deal about sharing. This will often work as toddlers get bored quickly and she’ll probably appreciate the distraction.

Nip it in the Bud – Anytime two toddlers are playing together it’s best to keep a close eye on things. As soon as you see a potential situation about to erupt, dive in there and break it up. Tempt your child with a more interesting toy or show them a fun new game.

If your child is playing nicely and another child is trying to take her things then distract that child. Find something similar or a close replacement to what your child has and offer it to them. Tell them how great it is, of course, don’t overdo it or then you’ll have two toddlers fighting over this new and wonderful toy you’re talking about.

Walk Away – If things get really bad and your child refuses to give back a toy to their crying owner then it’s time to take action. Gently pick up your child and walk away. They may kick and scream but remember YOU are in charge. Take him to a quite corner or space and wait for him to calm down. Then give him a hug and explain that you know he really wanted that toy but that it belongs to someone else.

Chances are your child isn’t going to understand or accept the meaning of this but you’ve now diffused the situation and can continue to play happily.

The Aftermath – After the fact it’s great to talk things over with your child and explain why it’s important to share, but be realistic. Most toddlers won’t understand the concept of sharing or why they should do it and all the talking in the world isn’t going to change things.

As your child starts to mature that’s the time when it’s more appropriate to try and reason with them since they will start to have an understanding of actions and consequences. During the toddler years that understanding isn’t there.

The best way is often to avoid and / or distract your toddler. This will help diffuse
a lot of incidents before they even start.
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